Vyhľadávanie
I wouldn't wish even my worst enemy to live through the morning that followed. After our sleepless night we were completely worn out. One look in the mirror was enough to confirm that I hadn't just dreamt it all, the horror of that night was real. My head was as bald as my knee. And Siso's too.
Mama took one look at us and her coffee cup fell from her hand. And when I remember the faces of our schoolmates ... To this day my cheeks burn with shame.
Even Siso, master of the situation at other times, was unable to pretend he didn't care. During the first two breaks he sat in the classroom as quiet as a mouse, but in the end he was the one who showed most courage. After the fourth hour's lessons he was flying around the school corridors quite the same as before.
Suddenly it struck me that having the temperamental Siso as my twin was very convenient. By his boldness he made all the gawpers familiar with the fact that we were bald. And so when I myself finally dared to peep out of the classroom, nobody even noticed me. Still, everyone must have found it very amusing to watch two equally hairless lads running around the school.
We quickly came to terms with the loss of our hair; after all, the hair would grow again. But we didn't forgive our sister for her misdeed. Quite the contrary. We racked our brains to think of a way we could make as much trouble for her as she had made for us. And then the idea came to me.
"Siso?" I said, breaking in on my brother's weighty thoughts. "I reckon I've come up with something."
"If you're thinking of the razor, forget it. I thought of that already, but Dad has put it away and I don't know where. It could take us forever to find it."
"I wasn't thinking of the razor," I explained to my brother. "I have something better in mind."
Siso immediately gave me his full attention.
"I thought of the photo albums. You know, the ones that Mama loves looking at."
"What about them?"
"Do you remember how Dasha tore one photo out of our hands, the one that shows her as a baby completely naked?"
"I remember, of course I do. She turned the whole flat into a circus," Siso said, beginning to smile. "Are you thinking of the same thing as me?"
"Exactly that!" I nodded.
"Let's do it!" Siso jumped up and ran for the albums. We had no problem finding the photo. I really don't understand why people take such pleasure in snapping small children without any clothes. Just so that later on the person in the photo will be ashamed. There are similar photos of Siso and me, but we confiscated these immediately so that our sister would be unable to take a similar revenge.
We put back the albums in their place. Until someone looked through them the photo we had removed would not be missed.
In the morning we immediately put our plan into practice. We went to school a little bit early and while I stood guard Siso pinned Dasha's photo to the noticeboard in her classroom. He put it quite high up so that our sister could not reach it, and with a red felt pen he wrote beneath it: Dasha Naked.
That was all. We fled from the classroom before the first student entered, and we roared laughing like lunatics.
Our laughter didn't last the whole day. At lunchtime we saw Dasha in the canteen with her classmates. She looked normal. In fact, when she noticed us she came over to us with a smile on her face.
"Thank you, little brothers!" she said in a self-important tone. "Because of you I'm the most popular girl in the class. Even the teacher praised me for my bright idea. Tomorrow the others have to bring in their own photos as babies. It seems we're to have an exhibition on the noticeboard, so that we can see how this or that person has changed."
She smiled at us contemptuously and off she went with an air of importance, to rejoin her classmates.
I was completely at a loss for words. So too was Siso, evidently. How could our sister be so fortunate, why was she able to turn to her own benefit every trap that we laid? It didn't make sense. Well, she was so small!
The rest of that day brought us no joy. But the following day took us totally by surprise.
We had no reason to hurry to school. And so when we finally arrived, most of our fellow students were already in the classroom.
"Well then? Have you found the girlfriends already?" Milan asked as soon as we got to the door.
"What are you on about? What girlfriends?" Siso demanded angrily.
"Stop pretending!" the classmate said with a grin. "We all know anyhow that you're looking for girlfriends!"
"For kissing!" giggled the class gossip Dana, and immediately withdrew into a huddle of tittering girls.
"What drivel are you talking?" I said, rushing in among them, but the stupid creatures ran in all directions, whooping.
"About this!" Misho produced a piece of paper on which someone had written in crooked letters with a coloured felt-tip pen:
SISO AND PISHKO, THE ONE-AND-ONLY BALDHEADED TWINS, ARE LOOKING FOR TWO GIRLFRIENDS FOR KISSING: ANYONE WHO IS INTERESTED SHOULD REPORT TO 4B!
"Give me that!" Siso grabbed the paper from his hands.
"No use getting mad!" Misho chuckled. "It's all over the school!"
I felt like giving him one in the teeth, the little sneerer, but there was no time for that. Siso and I ran from the classroom as if for dear life.
"She's gone too far!" Siso said furiously as he ran. "Treacherous creature! She let on nothing, and all the while she was plotting vengeance! She'll regret this!"
We ran into the sister's classroom. Her teacher was standing in front of the blackboard.
"What do you want, boys? The bell will go in a few minutes, you ought to return to your classroom!"
"We ...." I gasped brokenly. "We, we need to speak with our sister," I blurted out finally.
Dasha looked at us with horror, then fixed her terrified eyes on the teacher.
To our satisfaction the teacher nodded to her, signalling she should go out to us. Reluctantly she approached.
"You viper!" Siso hissed quietly.
"If you touch me I'll tell the teacher," Dasha whispered in terror, and together we went out to the corridor.
As soon as the door had closed Siso wanted to fling himself on her, but I held him back.
"Dasha, if you tell us all the places where you left your advertisements, we won't beat you."
"But ..." Siso wanted to protest. I yelled at him: "If you use force on her, not alone will she tell you nothing but she'll complain to the teacher. And that's something we really don't need."
I turned to our sister.
"So where are they?"
"In all the girls' toilets. And on the canteen door."
As soon as she had said this, she turned and ran off to the classroom.
We had to move fast to get round all the toilets. We did indeed find advertisements, which we immediately tore up. If the bell had rung in the meantime, so what? Our honour as boys was more important than the Slovak lesson.
However, our teacher saw things differently. For being 15 minutes late we got marks in our attendance books. In the end she threatened that if we did any more mischief she would want to speak to our parents, and that was the very last thing we needed. Once Mama had talked to the teacher she would pack us off to the children's home without any more delay..
Translated by John Minahane
